10 Things Every Single Man Owns

It occurred to me the other day that a pattern was emerging. Every single man I’ve ever met, dated, stalked, and sent to therapy seemed to harbor certain habits and/or belongings. It was uncanny – like my impression of Britney Spears ordering a burrito from Chipotle. 1. Empty pizza boxes I once dated a man […]

Don’t Fear the Reaper. Fear Lucky Charms.

If only writing about fear made you brave. Actually, if we’re wishing for stuff then I wish that eating junk food would make you thin. Imagine how great that would be – oh, looks like you gained a few pounds. Better just stick to pizza and candy corn this week. Lay off that broccoli for […]

Who knew living under a bridge would be my second choice?

They say that you can’t go back home again. Or as Thomas Wolfe actually put it: “You can’t go back home to your family, back home to your childhood … back home to a young man’s dreams of glory and of fame … back home to places in the country, back home to the old […]

The Fight or Flight Response Has a Third Option

  The road trip has started innocently enough. Just me and my friend driving across Pennsylvania to visit a local college. If you’ve never driven across Pennsylvania, I doubt this story is going to inspire you. You’ll pass a river at some point, which you’ll confidently identify as the Susquehanna (not super confidently but…good enough), […]

First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage, Then Comes Lobster

WARNING: This subject matter may not be suitable for readers under the age of 18. So I just did that. Mostly to cover my ass. And also because it makes me feel all dangerous to be writing about sex. That’s right folks, this is a post on SEX. And it has been a long time […]

Pizza Boxes & Styrofoam: Your Essential Guide to Moving

“I like to move it, move it. I like to move it, move it.” You may never be as enthusiastic to move as the members of Reel 2 Real (those dudes were all about moving it), but I feel pretty confident that after reading my essential guide you’ll be slightly less likely to have a […]